Email #39

Dear Harriet

The first rule in activism of any kind is to look after yourself. I need to listen to this rule. I'm tired. I'm worn out and worn down. So tonight's email will be brief.  Because I am no good to anyone if I do not look after myself.

Loving my job doesn't take away the fact that I am still depressed. It doesn't take away from the fact that what triggers my depression the most is fear of what lies ahead.

Post budget we are all driven by this fear and people seek guidance and reassurance and understanding of simply how we will be affected in our day to day lives.  The BBC have an online calculator that allows people to see from a very basic perspective of how better or worse they will be under the changes brought by the budget..according to which I will be no better or worse off than I am now. In one respect this helps calm me however it's simplistic and fails to recognise that I'm only just scrapping by and that once the tax credit people start combing through my business they will decide it's unviable and I will be forced to give up a job I love that keeps me sane.

i might not be a millionaire but I contribute to the economy and I support other businesses I have to obtain stuff from. My contribution and that of other small ventures like mine all add up to a business model that is profitable that may well go under without the contributions small businesses like mine make.

Short sighted economics seems to be the policy all round.

Sometimes I wonder why I bother.  Attempting to engage a Tory lite Labour is seemingly pointless as you seem to agree with how the poor and vulnerable are treated. I despair at such behavior and lament the world my children are growing up in.

Constituent, Labour Party member, Union member, sleep deprived carer, concerned citizen, self employed mother, mother of a teenager with ASD, socialist, environmentalist, Disabled Rights supporter, Jeremy Corbyn supporter, mother feeding her children with nectar points, defender of the vulnerable, advocate, logistics savant, concerned niece, grassroots activist, anti austerity campaigner, RNLI supporter, unashamed welfare state service user & social housing tenant, protester, fire brigade supporter, carers allowance claimant, less than perfect parent, socialist agitator, worrier, mental health service user, football mum, social justice campaigner, immigrant, proletarian, CND supporter, #endausteritynow campaigner, someone with nothing better to do than wait for a plumber, cost cutting football medic, Catholic, one voice speaking up, someone seriously questioning their membership, angry social commentator, frustrated activist